I BELIEVE…

3 Aug

i believe in laughter, friends, late night movies, pillow talk, dancing in the rain, singing out of tune, smores over the campfire, camping in the UP, falling in love with moments, memorizing people’s smiles, challenging the everyday, searching for inner peace, listening to good tunes, relaxing, doing reckless things, adventures, harry potter, good books, movies that make you cry, people that make you smile, surprises, going on dates, being young, having a close family, being a good person, treating others the way you want to be treated, having great sex, kissing in the rain, swearing like a sailor every now and again, pushing yourself to be a better person, making other people happy, doing quirky cute things,taking silly photos, making faces at babies, day dreaming, the power of word, making someone’s day better, getting and giving massages, good food, experiencing culture, chicago, train rides, people watching, coffee, hugs, and above all i believe in love of life, people and beauty.

the journey- mary oliver

2 Aug

emotions and stress have a way of piling up and effecting how you view life and this world in a way. i’m beginning to see that when life is emotional and stressful for me that i take it out on the people i love the most. which is such a common, and yet terrible thing for people to do. there’s something so horrid about beating up the people you love for no reason.
i’ve also noticed that i am a frequent viewer of the bad things in my life…an annoying little habit i picked up from an ex-friend of mine…something i’m trying very hard to rid myself of. looking at the bad portions of life and excluding all the good is unhealthy and unfair.
i sat here this morning pondering what was going on in my head over the last few days and how i could combat the emotional rollercoaster (with lots of ups and downs, although much less fun) that was turned on inside my head. my morning cup of coffee, a little gentle folk music and a conversation with a good friend can often work wonders on storms of the mind. so i wrote a letter to myself about all the stupid things that are going on and how i need to relax.
within these words i found a calming inner peace in knowing that although life is never perfect and life is often unfair, it always evens out in the end. we are never given things in life that we cannot conquer without a little determination, motivation and guidance. And so with those notions of advice i’ve decided to take a fresh look at the world around me and how i’ve been going about things these last few weeks. maybe just maybe a new outlook, a little coffee, and a little help from the people i love will make this rough patch all the more smooth.

paperweight- joshua radin

19 Jul

this song is lovely…

Been up all night staring at you
wondering what’s on your mind
i’ve been this way with so many before
but this feels like the first time
you want the sunrise to go back to bed
i want to make you laugh
mess up my bed with me
kick off the covers i’m waiting
every word you say i think
i should write down
don’t want to forget come daylight
happy to lay here
just happy to lbe here
i’m happy to know you
play me a song
your newest one
please leave your taste on my tongue
paperweight on my back
cover me like a blanket
mess up my bed with me
kick off the covers i’m waiting
every word you say i think
i should write down
don’t want to forget come daylight
and no need to worry
that’s wastin time
and no need to wonder
what’s been on my mind
it’s you
it’s you
it’s you
every word you say i think
i should write down
don’t want to forget come daylight
and i give up
i let you win
you win cause i’m not counting
you made it back
to sleep again
wonder what you’re dreaming

fast times at wetmore landing

12 Jul

this past saturday we were graced with some glorious summer weather here in da beautiful UP. it would have been a total waste to not get out and enjoy the beauty of the world, so we (jenny, nick, and i) went out on a camping adventure out at wetmore landing. after a decent trek back into the woods in the 85 degree weather we found our beautiful camping destination…a little cove right on the water. from our spot we could see both little presque and big presque as well as lots and lots of cold blue water.
we took care of the usual camp things like starting a fire and setting up tents, after a nice refreshing dip in lake superior. this is where the real fun begins. we explored our little camp site and buckled down for the evening in front of our fire for some food, beverages and conversation. We set off some fireworks and watched them light up the night sky as the sun began to set. After we ran out of fireworks we decided to go for a late night dip in the lake.

we didn’t last long in the dark frigid water. After about two minutes of standing in the cold water and only being able to go in up to our thighs we wandered back to the fire to warm ourselves up….sadly nickolas fell over a buried tree and a stray branch found it’s way into the flesh of his shin.
he was a trooper through the whole ordeal as dr. jenny and nurse summer bandaged up the wound as best as possible for the conditions at hand. but luckily we’d brought a little alcohol out with us and were able to sanitize his wound and get most of the sand out of his gouge. we had to wait to morning to bring him to the hospital however because we were a mile and a half from the car and the trail was brutal enough during the day without injuries. it was one restless night for all of us. luckily the impending thunderstorm never reached us, even as we watched the rain a mile or so off of shore pour down onto the lake.
as soon as morning came we packed up and asked the neighbors if nick could hitch a ride in their boat to the trailhead as to avoid the perils of the steep muddy trail. jenny and i met him at the beach and helped him back to the car…i took nick to the hospital where he was given 13 stitches to sew up his wound. poor kid. he was definitely a trooper. i’m very proud of him…but nervous to take him camping next weekend….we’ll see what happens.

people

7 Jul

this summer is continuing to shape up nicely. i’ve begun reading again something my ambition has been lacking to do. i’ve been cooking delicious foods. i’ve been having adventures below the bridge. and i’ve been discovering things about friendships, love, and consideration that i’ve never before looked so deeply into and most of all i’m learning about people, myself included.

my favorite way to live my life is in a constant state of learning and discovery. from taking the time to notice a new flower to learning how to knit a complex scarf. if i have not learned something new i feel my day is lost. but, just partaking in this life and in this world teaches you new things everyday. my favorite thing about life is people. i love them. all of them, even those who drive me nutters.

people are such a unique an interesting thing. watching people interact with each other amazes me and makes me smile. and even though i have such a love of people, i also realize that some people will always be cruel, angry, judgemental and lost people. those people are sometimes the ones we love the most, because we feel as people we can help and change them we can guide them. it doesn’t always work that way, but the beauty about people is that there will always be someone there to try and help out a situation. i love human kindness in all it’s simplicity from helping a little boy find his mother at the grocery store to babysitting for the neighbor during an emergency. human kindness is often lost to our own selfish desires but, little examples like this amaze me and strike up my faith in humanity.

dress up

25 Jun

today as i rummaged through my closet in an attempt to find an outfit that was a) clean, b) decent looking and c) improved my mood i noticed something about myself. wearing things that are relatively silly lifts my mood and makes me feel so much better about life. i chose my big gray sweater vest that looks like it was made for a 55 year old male investment banker. i instantly smiled when i thought about how much my friends tease me for this goofy goodwill pick made for me by my lady lover.

this notion of silly clothes improving my mood is by no means a new concept for me. however, i’ve never noticed that i do indeed grab certain clothes from my closet when i feel the need to be cheered up. my turquoise prom dress, viking horns, grandpa sweater vest, pilgrim sweater, and 80’s red blazer all make appearances from time to time.

i think playing dress up as a child probably instilled a little association in my young brain that fun clothes make for fun days. and it seems that notion holds true in my life. i love days when the clothes you wear don’t matter and the only thing you know is that although you might look silly outside those clothes are making you smile inside. that’s the glory of being goofy, it helps improve things.

sigh

24 Jun

this summer is about half over. and i can’t name anything extraordinary that i have done/accomplished since it began. i mean it’s not the lonely summers filled with harry potter books and bike rides of my childhood, but it is possibly more boring. Working 40 hours a week is awesome for my bank account and great for all that survival type stuff that one encounters upon entering adult hood. like rent and food and such…but, i still think memories trump dinero. and well….i’ve made a few good ‘uns this summer i can’t help but remember how amazing last summer was.

alas, we should not sit and reminisce about a summer long gone, and we should just try to create another summer full of fantastic memories to miss next year when school starts. However, the work leaves little time for fun and lots of time for facebook. the weekends pass much too quickly…sigh. I’m pretty sure that the upcoming weeks will get a little more exciting as the fourth of july is upon us and my dear friend from minnesota will be visiting. and the weekend after two of my lovely troll friends will make a trip to da UP. People visiting makes things much more exciting as well as provides ample opportunities for excitement.There are plans for camping, dancing, and other joy filled things a lady can look forward to.

In the mean time I should begin to look for some sort of lovely book to read or something. As I find my mind wandering far from productive and sometimes healthy topics. So, maybe a slightly trashy easy read will take my mind away from heavy things…the books i’ve tried to read this summer have too much substance (sadly) for me to find them enjoyable.
that’s how things work in the summer. we want things to be easy and light and full of fun and adventures. that’s the way it should be. and hopefully that’s the way it will become.